Luisa

Family Background and Fijian Community

Luisa:

Okay, so my name is Luisa Seviua. I’m 29 years old. I was born and raised here in Melbourne. My parents migrated from Fiji. I think my dad came here […] my mum came […] eighties. They settled out east, in the eastern suburbs. My dad was playing rugby at the time, so that’s how we actually got our…Or my parents got their permanent residency. He was sponsored by [inaudible, distortion] rugby club. I’m the oldest of four children. I have a brother and two younger sisters. They range from 23, 20 and 17. What can I say? So I grew up in yeah, out at eastern suburbs, probably being the only Islander in school, in primary school definitely. In high school I think there were maybe four or five other Islanders. They were all Tongan, and we all kind of just became friendly with each other, which is nice because there weren’t many other brown people in the school, so that was really good that we could have I guess some sort of familiar-ality. Is that even a word? Anyways, within school.

Growing up I think within the Fijian community, like we were always…Because we lived so far out, we weren’t heavily involved, but any time there was a big function and stuff, we’d be there, so I was pretty familiar with the people within the community, and I had my friends that I grew up with in the community as well. So I guess I had…

High School

Moving up, fast forward to high school, I always had two separate worlds of my school life and my pālangi (European) friends and hanging out with them, and then on the weekends I would have my Fijian life where it’s a whole ‘nother world, and even now as an adult, my friends that I keep in contact with, they’re like “We never realized you had this whole other world, you spoke a different language, you know, you did this, you did that.” It was just nothing that I ever really spoke about ever. I kept my worlds pretty separate.

Yeah, so that’s…You know, I think as a teenager, growing up in the eastern suburbs especially, like you just want to fit in. Everyone’s White, so you just do what you need to do to get through, which is like, I kind of, within this bit of a misfit situation where I was too brown for the White kids but too White for the brown kids, so go figure, a bit of a I wouldn’t say identity crisis, but just a weird place to be in as a teenager.

What else can I say? I think growing up out in the east like had its perks growing up. My parents really pushed me to get a job when I turned 15, so I did that, whereas my other Fijian peers weren’t working. They were still at school. I think I became quite independent quite young because of that. I was either at school, or I was working, or I was playing sport, so that took up a lot of my time as a teenager.

Applying for the Police Force and Changing Direction

What else can I say? Growing up, I think like about 15, 16, I definitely knew that I wanted to be a cop. So that was what I…Which is ridiculous now that I look back on it. I like, finishing school that’s all I wanted to do, so I got a full-time job working in retail, tried to get some life experience. Started to apply when I was 21 and then went through the physical test and like surprise, surprise, I didn’t pass the BMI test. If anyone knows what the BMI test is, it’s your height versus your weight, and you need to fit into some sort of this specific category, and according to the BMI, like I presume most Islanders would be, I was severely overweight. So that kind of set me back.

What year was that? That was like 2012, 2013. So I got knocked back and had to wait a year to reapply. I think that within that year, I became quite frustrated career-wise because I needed to wait a year for that, I didn’t know what I was doing, and then…You know, nursing, I guess for me was always at the back of my mind, and I think what really drew me to nursing was that it gave me the ability to have the opportunity to work overseas. I knew I was going to struggle academically because I can’t write or even string a sentence properly to save my life, but I thought that given the opportunities nursing provided, I thought that would be a better career pathway for me. So we started to look into it 2013-ish, I think. I was still working full time in retail at this stage, by the way, and then in 2014 I applied. 2015 I got into the uni.

University and Pacific Peers

So in 2015 I’m 24. I’m classed as a mature age student heading into tertiary education, having no idea what the hell I was doing. I don’t even know how I got through uni to be honest, but when we got there there were five other Pacific Islanders, all Tongan, mind you, which was awesome to see, at my uni, and I think we all again like naturally all bonded with each other. We created our own little Pacific Islander Association, that wasn’t registered with the uni. It was just between us, and we would gather and talk. I think there were…Four of us were studying nursing, one was doing teaching and health science or something like that, and it was awesome to see, and we would always have this conversation that like, why is there only five of us here? Like where are the rest of our community? What can we do to get these kids in the door? Like we were…You had your minorities. We were like the end scale of the minority. Like we were the smallest of the minorities at our uni, and I think that…I don’t know how to explain it, but I think a lot of us had that conversation where like we’re very underrated as a community, and I think we need to break that cycle of coming into uni and getting that higher education.

Beginning Nursing Career

So I think most of us have finished uni now. I know that one of the girls is definitely working not far from me as a nurse, which is awesome, but I don’t know. I ended up finishing uni actually…Yeah, finished uni, now working in a major hospital, working in the emergency department, having a good time. It’s crazy busy. You know, I think with COVID and everything it’s obviously been a crazy time to be a healthcare worker.

Oh, what else can I say? I don’t even know what else to say. There’s not many other Pacific Islanders that work in my organization, and if they are Pacific Islanders, like best believe I know who they are. You know, I’ve ensured that I made myself familiar with the other Pacific Island nurses and other healthcare workers. Again, we’re a minority, and it’s really good to see our own people doing awesome things within a healthcare setting. And I’ve had the same conversation with other Pacific Islander nurses about like why isn’t there more of us? We need more Pacific Islander nurses, I think. Generally speaking, Pacific Islander people are very empathetic in nature, and the caring side of things is really…It just comes so naturally; I feel like there needs to be more of us out there. But you know, I guess this is why we’re doing this, to hopefully inspire some young kids to come through.

Support in Education

Ane:

No, that’s good. Thanks Luisa. So just going back to your primary years, from what you can remember, do you remember what it was like with your learning? Like how did you go in your primary school and high school years of learning? So recognizing too that we’re children of immigrants, that obviously the English would have been very…Well, it certainly was for my parents, so my parents couldn’t be as hands-on in terms of helping me with my schooling. I don’t know if you had a similar experience, and if you didn’t, did you get any sort of support during your schooling years to help you get through certain subjects, or like what do you remember during those times?

Luisa:

Well now thinking about it, I actually didn’t learn how to speak English till I was five or four, so when I hit kindergarten age, which is funny now, because listen to the way that I talk. My parents, neither of them finished high school. I know that they both wanted to be really hands on with my learning, but I think at the same time like I don’t know if they knew what they were doing. I think that like I always had a bit of an attitude problem growing up, and so I always just thought I knew everything. I was always kind of brush them off when it came to assisting me with my schoolwork. But with that said, I was pretty fortunate that I kind of knew like…The subjects that I did at school like math, science, and whatever, I like, I got it. I studied hard, so I figured it out myself.

I think I did some extra English, like tutoring and stuff, because I really struggled with writing an essay and whatnot, but everything else I managed to do myself, and this was before the days of YouTube, so I didn’t have YouTube to help me. I feel like YouTube’s a great tool these days, but I think I just spent a lot of time reading books and reading, really studying my stuff, the subjects that I wanted to excel in, so yeah.

Cultural Identity

Ane:

Recognizing too that you were probably one of like minority-minority, what was it like growing up around other kids who might not have appreciated your background?

Luisa:

What was it like? You know what, I think growing up in that era there wasn’t a lot of awareness of other cultures, and so everyone, like no one wanted to be a different skin colour, no one wanted to have a different culture or speak another language. So literally like, now that I look back on it, I just did whatever I needed to do to get through. So if it was assimilating with their culture, that’s what I did. I think high school is such a crappy time. You know, you’re going through puberty, you’re going through changes in life, and it’s on top of that you’re a brown kid in a White society.

Like it’s crap is what it is. It’s not ideal, but you do what you need to do, and again, back then, I think the mindset was really different as to what it is now, where my 17-year-old sister loves that she’s brown and loves that she’s different to everybody else, whereas 17-year-old me, all I wanted to do was fit in. You know what I mean? Like I think even to the point where I knew… I wouldn’t say I guise my culture. Is guise an English word? Like it’s really used in the Fijian. Is it? I don’t know. Not like snob, but I was really just like, “Oh, yeah, no.” You know, I always just thought I was better than everybody else in that sense, because I had so many White friends and all of that jazz, but now looking back on it as an adult, it’s high school. You got to do what you got to do to get through, so yeah.

Between High School and University

Ane:

So when you finished high school, you didn’t go straight into uni, right? I think that’s what you mentioned.

Luisa:

Yeah. Actually, this is probably a really bad example, but by the end of year 12 I was over it. I didn’t even check my, back then it was called an ENTER score. I didn’t even check my ENTER score, because I knew I wanted to be a cop. I was so set on that idea on me wanting to become a police officer, that that’s all I wanted to do. So always had the plan to get a full-time job, work and get my driver’s license, you know, just enjoy my life before I decided to become a real adult and become a cop. So you know I spent my years 18, 19, 20, 21, just yeah, working full time and really familiarising myself with the process of becoming a police officer. I was fortunate enough to have a Fijian man who was a police officer and a family friend who I was able to pick his brain, and people that I work with at my retail job were also in the process of applying for the police force. So I always had somebody to look up to. I always had somebody that I could pick their brains in that sort of sense.

But you know, obviously didn’t turn out very well. Well, it’s worked out for the better, now that I look back on it, but I think finishing high school I just knew that I needed to do something. So even though I wasn’t studying, I know there’s a lot of pressure for kids to go straight to uni straight after school but like for me, it just wasn’t for me at the time, and I knew I didn’t have the maturity level to do a university degree, especially if I wasn’t going to use it. I didn’t see a point at 17, 18, so to me finding a job full time and just doing what I needed to do to get through at that age bracket was the most important thing for me. So yeah, working in retail, did it for a few years until we jumped into uni and decided that I wanted to become a nurse.

Family Influence and Expectations

Ane:

And so do you remember at what point in your life you decided you wanted to be…Because I know you’ve mentioned a couple of times in terms of wanting to be a cop, but what was it about being a cop that made you like go, “Yeah, that’s my dream job”?

Luisa:

My father’s father was a police officer in Fiji. My dad would always say that “Oh, if we were still in Fiji, I’d be a cop.” So I think it was really just like implanted to me at a young age. My dad’s younger brother was a police officer in Fiji, and my father would always talk about being a cop in Fiji, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, and I think it was always just in my head like “That’s what I want to do. That’s what I want to be.” I think in the background of that, I was like, “Oh, a nurse would be okay as well.” But I also had that mindset of, “Oh, I don’t want to wipe people’s bums all day. Like, that’s gross.”

But so yeah, I always had that in the back of my mind, and when…I guess being an Islander kid you always want to make the parents proud and stuff, and so when I had mentioned it to my dad, he was over the moon. You know I would have been 17 at the time. “Yeah, this is what I want to do.” Like he was absolutely rapt that I wanted to be a cop. So yeah, that’s what made me do that, and then obviously as I’ve mentioned, failed the BMI test. I guess that really kind of opened my eyes up in terms of career paths, and like what else can I do that’s not going to discriminate me against like my body fat?

So that’s where the nursing thing came into play, and at the start of it, my parents were like, “Oh.” I wouldn’t say they were against it, but they questioned it. My dad was like, “What about a police officer? Like what about that? Like are you going to go back and do that?” And I was like, “Probably not. I think I like this nursing pathway.” I had become really happy with it. My mum, to start with, was like, her first thing she said to me was “Why? Why do you want to be a nurse? Everyone’s a nurse. Why won’t you go study something different?” And I don’t know if that comes down to, I guess they’ll…And this is my, no, a thing like I’m trying to bag out my parents, but I don’t know if that was like I guess their lack of understanding or like the bigger picture of the nursing world and the opportunities it brings, but that was my mum’s first, like “Why?”

I don’t know, but I think they were very different to when they came to my graduation and saw me get my certificate and saw me put on my scrubs for the first day and start at the practice in the clinical setting, but now that they look back on it, I think they’re like “Oh, yeah. It makes sense now,” because they see the opportunities this job brings, and even if I don’t stay a nurse for the rest of my life, there’s other things I can work on from this baseline bachelor’s degree.

Challenges at University

Ane:

When you were in uni studying for your degree, how did you find that experience of being back at uni a little bit older? How did you get through those years of studying? How did you find the content?

Luisa:

Nursing’s a funny one. I feel like people go into nursing in different stages of their lives. So I was really able to resonate with a lot of people there. Like I actually made friends with a couple of mature-age students in which I’m still friends with now, and then I had like the other, the Tongan guys that I was friends with as well. I think they all had I guess a part to play in pushing me through.

I enjoyed the content, because it was stuff that I actually enjoyed. Like I love the anatomy, the physiology side of things. It was a lot, and it was information overload all the time. I would sit there in my lectures like scratching my head thinking like “What the hell have I gotten myself into?” But I think at the end of the day, I’m like no, you think of the end game, and you think of what this is going to provide for you and your family.

For me personally, I’m not an academic writer. I can’t write an essay to save myself. If I had to write an essay to save my life, I’d be dead. I hate academic writing, so I think that was probably my biggest downfall in terms of getting me through my education. I think clinically I was really good. I have the knowledge in my brain. I just couldn’t put it out into words. That was always going to be my downfall in terms of getting me through my degree. I was fortunate enough that there were programs available to help you with your academic writing, and there were other things that you could do that would help you achieve or help you pass these subjects.

I would also just, like even when it came to resume writing, I was really fortunate to have a friend who’s also Pacific Islander, she’s actually my housemate funnily enough now, that I would send my resume to, and she would go through it, and she’s quite smart in terms of that writing and all of that jazz. So she would look at it, and then I would have another friend that would look at it. So I think it was just like having the people that I could turn to as well to look through my things and, you know, a second set of eyes before I had to hand them in definitely helped me.

Ane:

So when you think about the areas where you would have struggled, is there a point where you can identify why those areas would have been a struggle for you?

Luisa:

I think I’ve always just sucked in English. There’s no…yeah, I was really always good at maths and science. I really liked science in school, but English was always my downfall. Essay writing was always my downfall, and I was always kind of just like…You know, I probably could have tried harder, or I probably could have seeked more assistance you know, but I don’t know, I always just couldn’t be…I wouldn’t say couldn’t be bothered, but I just like…Yeah, no, like I just couldn’t be bothered to go through those pathways.

Language and Visiting Fiji

Ane:

Do you guys practice speaking the Fijian language at home? Like how active are you in terms of speaking Fijian language, and do you guys travel back to Fiji? Yeah, so could you just touch on that?

Luisa:

Yeah, absolutely. So I guess that I was pretty fortunate in the sense that my parents always raised us kids speaking Fijian. Kind of like with it I feel like they really went hard on me because I’m the oldest, and then it kind of like fizzled out a little bit when they got to the fourth child. So the fourth child can insult you in Fijian and will understand you, whereas I will speak full sentences in Fijian to my parents, and I think which is great. I think knowing another language is amazing. I think that’s a really awesome life skill to have. So yeah, I grew up in a Fijian speaking family. We were fortunate enough that both my maternal grandparents were alive. My grandma only died last year. So we always had grandparents to go back to in Fiji. Both my parents, all their siblings were still in Fiji, so we still had a massive connection back there.

So we would often go back, and we would always just stay with my grandparents. They lived in like a really rural part of Fiji, so we literally are disconnected from the city life in Fiji. I never had 3G connection there until last year, so it was pretty you know. It was great, and I think it really, especially for us kids, really humbled us to see what our lives could have been compared to what our lives are now.

All of our first cousins and stuff are there, so it’s just like we just run amok and have the best time. But also like we learned so many things about our families, you learn about the gossip in your family, which is always interesting. You know, just the little things like the cooking techniques and the stories. You always learn your history and stuff through oral history, so picking up things that you learned from your elders. Yeah, I think it’s really awesome that we have this I guess culture that’s still heavily practiced. I think we’re really lucky in that sense that there’s always that to fall back onto.

Parent’s Adaptation to Australia

Ane:

So when your parents moved to Australia, what did they do in terms of finding…Like how did they find with their settling in Australia? Do you remember, and what was it like sort of adapting to Australian life?

Luisa:

I guess from what I remember and what I can kind of put together for my parents, because my dad was sponsored by the local rugby club, there were already a few Fijians there, so they automatically became my dad’s circle of friends, you know. They would be with him every weekend drinking kava. I was running around as a toddler with them or like at the rugby grounds and stuff. I think they always were lucky enough to have that support network of their small community with…You know, we’re talking 1990, 1989, so this is, you know? I think this is when we really had a big influx of Melbourne, like, Fijians come through, and similar to what my parent…Like my dad came through being sponsored by rugby clubs in Victoria to come play for them. So I guess that’s when they had their little community settings.

My dad actually only just recently told me when he first came to Melbourne, he worked as a garbo and only lasted two weeks because he couldn’t stand the cold weather. So I feel like my parents had a fair few different jobs before finding their long-term job which they’ve had. Like my dad, he didn’t finish high school in Fiji. He pretty much just did whatever he could to get here, whatever he did to get started in life. So I think he was working for a trucking company, and then he left. For the longest part of my childhood worked as a store man at a toilet paper factory. So like everyone in the community always knew that my dad worked for the toilet paper factory because when we’d go to visit them, we’d always bring them toilet paper. Which is kind of embarrassing as a child, thinking about it, but super helpful because everyone’s going to need toilet paper, and you can see in the pandemic that we went through. My parents would’ve been the go-to if he was still working there.

It was always those factory jobs that my dad had. He worked fricken hard, and like most other Pacific Islander men, he did security on the side as well, just for a bit of extra cashflow and which, you know, he did what he had to do to get us through.

My mum, I actually don’t remember how much community she had in sense [of] when she first moved here. I think she had a couple of good friends in the early ’90s, just looking at photos and stuff, but she was the same. I think her first job was working at[Australian supermarket nameand then she went and did I feel like admin jobs, reception jobs, had some kids, and then actually went back to working within like the management roles.

But I think my parents always knew that they wanted us kids to…I’m getting emotional. To be better, to…You know, they come here for better opportunities, and this is why we do…I think the biggest reason why we do this, or I do this, and I’m so thankful for that, because I love my job. I’m so fortunate. Oh, I’m so sorry.

Yeah, it’s not very often you can say that you wake up every morning and you’re like, “I love my job so much,” you know, and my parents are my biggest motivators. Yeah, and they come here with nothing. They only recently just…My parents have rented their whole lives and have only just been able to purchase a house, and they’ve really set themselves up, and seeing them do so well after struggling for so long, is a real big motivator to me. Oh gosh.

So yeah, I think they, if I can be quite frank, because they’ve done fucking awesome to come from nothing with barely a high school education to where they are now, and I think, you know, that’s always a driving motivator and I always…I think my siblings sometimes forget, and I think other Pacific Islander kids forget how much your parents or your grandparents struggled to get here and to raise you. You know, if that’s not in the back of your mind, that should be your number one driving, you know, so it’s a motivation to do well, I think. We’re really lucky that we live here and have so many opportunities, whether it’s trade or going to uni or just getting a job. It’s almost a double-edged sword, though, because so many of us end up doing the same things that our parents did, and just not having the awareness of the opportunities that are available here.

Cultural Values and Expectations

Ane:

Are you guys or your parents still heavily involved in having to contribute to family things or contribute to like Fijian cultural things?

Luisa:

Not so much within this community here, but definitely back in Fiji there’s always something happening. Like this sounds horrible. There’s always a funeral. There’s always a wedding. There’s always something that we need to send money back or send this back. There’s always somebody calling on Facebook Messenger asking for something.

Ane:

So in terms of your personal experience, how do you deal with that, and how do you deal with that as a family?

Luisa:

I personally, it depends what it is. Like I often get people messaging me asking me for things, and it’s not even a “Hi, how are you?” It’s like, “Can you please send me this?” And it’s like “No.” I think people especially in the islands don’t realize how expensive it is to live here and how expensive it is to get by. I say that, and I buy like six dresses a week for no reason, but you know, it’s expensive. But me personally, I’m really good at ignoring messages, so I just ignore a lot of the messages.

But you know, my parents will always get phone calls about something, and it’s always, “Oh, Luisa, can you do this? Luisa, can you do that?” And as hard as it sounds, sometimes I have to call my parents out and be like, “Wait a minute. What is this for? What is this money going towards?” You know, you question things, and it’s, I hate to say it, but sometimes people take advantage of my parents because they live out here, and they think that they’ve got this never-ending fund of money, which they don’t. So sometimes you’ve just got to, as disrespectful as it is, especially growing up with Islander parents, you just need to be like, “Wait a minute,” you know, check them real quick to make sure that this is legit and money’s getting spent properly.

It’s such a double-edged sword though, because you want to look out for them, but at the same time you don’t want to come across like you’re being disrespectful. But there are often things that are happening that my parents are constantly sending money back to Fiji, like I suppose people at Western Union know my parents’ names by first name, and probably know how to spell it all. But it is what it is, isn’t it?

Career Aspirations

Ane:

So in terms of where you are at now with your nursing, what does it look like for you now, like your future prospects in nursing? Do you think it’s something that you’ll continue, and if so, where can you see yourself going with your nursing degree? If not, what does life after nursing look like for you?

Luisa:

In terms of my nursing degree, my end game, I want to work with First Nation communities, or like somewhere in the Torres Strait, because it’s as close as Fiji without being Fiji, within being in Australia, if that makes sense. It’s still kind of the closest thing that I have to Fijian lifestyle.

But with that, there’s certain criteria you need to fill to fit into to work with First Nations communities or within the Torres Strait. A lot of them either have a critical care nursing background. Critical care means like intensive care unit or emergency department, your main two crit cares. So for me is I guess creating that pathway for myself to get that experience, to get, and you need to specialize essentially as well, so do further studies to be your critical care nurse, to give me that experience, so then get me into that door of working with First Nation communities.

Where I’m at, at the moment, I’m hoping to eventually specialize. I’ve only just started in ED, literally two weeks ago, so just got to work my way up there, get where I need to be, because honestly, working with First Nations communities, it’s such a dream of mine. So just…now that I know where I’m at, I just need to keep forcing that pathway for myself, which means I need to write more essays, which sucks, but you know, got to do what you’ve got to do to get through.

Advice for Youth

Ane:

So just thinking now like in terms of other Pasifika youth that are looking at your journey and contemplating the pathway to potentially being a nurse, what is like the three tips that you would recommend that they do, based on your experience, to help them get to that pathway? Because sometimes it’s a little bit difficult for us to get from high school to uni in the first place, so what are three tips that you would recommend our youth do to become a nurse?

Luisa:

I think especially for us, there’s always something happening within the community or back home, so I think really researching your pathway. There’s so many ways to get into nursing these days, so whether it’s doing enrolled nursing and working as an enrolled nurse studying to be registered nurse, or even just becoming an enrolled nurse, I think, do your research. There’s always ways to do what you need to do. There are jobs that complement your study, for example, disability support work. In uni you don’t get taught how to look after people with disabilities, and I think something like that is great. It’s good money too. It’s super flexible and works really well with the uni and in terms of like caring for patients with complex care needs. So yeah, “Do your research” would be my first one.

I think, yeah second one would be “Studying is hard,” but I think you just need to look at the end game. As cliche as it sounds, there’s always light at the end of the tunnel, you know, blah, blah, blah, but there really is. Even if it takes you six years to get your degree, do what you need to do. Hustle, grind, whatever you need to do, just do it. If that’s what you want to do in life, you know, if there’s a way around it. I don’t know.

Role Models

Ane:

What about, so in your journey of study or in your career journey, have you had any study mentors or professional mentors that really kind of helped inspire you along the way? Or was there anybody in your journey that you were like, “Oh gosh, like that person is goals for me”?

Luisa:

Actually, within our Melbourne Fijian community there are a couple of Fijian nurses that I know of, and one of them, she worked overseas, and I guess I was always in the back of my head I’m like, “This woman worked overseas! She worked in Dubai for six years. I want to do that.” I think again, and it’s going back to seeing people who look like you, who were raised like you, doing things that you want to do, working in countries that you want to work in, I think always having that in the back of my mind was always kind of a “Yeah, like if they can do it, why can’t I do it?” kind of a thing. I think it’s that, isn’t it, seeing people that look like you doing things that you want to do. If that doesn’t motivate you, I don’t know what else I can say.

Success

Ane:

What is the ultimate success for you, what does that like? And it can be anything, whether it’s your personal life, financially, education-wise, what does success look like to you?

Luisa:

I think success for me would be like I’d love to pay off my parents’ mortgage. That would be real nice. That’d be nice.

That and pay off my HECS. If I had those things two paid it off, I’d be happy as Larry. Nothing else would bother me. Like pretty simple, it’s monetary, but yeah, I think that’s me.